I drew this a couple of months ago. I really enjoyed the process, the experimenting and then playfully adding polka dots just for the fun of it. I never shared it because there was such a mixed reaction from a few people – it is something you either love or hate apparently and I started to feel embarrassed and self doubt set in. Then I saw the photo today and felt that hiding it was almost like turning my back on a faithful friend just because other people had laughed. And that just wouldn’t do, especially with what is going on in the world today, so here I am, proudly presenting my floral friend, polka dots and all 🙂
It’s a little reminder to myself that although I love it when people DO like my drawings (champagne corks start popping in my heart!), that isn’t why I make them, and changing my own response because of someone else’s is silly. I draw or paint for the sheer joy that it brings to me – the way it switches my brain into some whole other space where my worries disappear, colour flows across the page and scribbly little marks appear on my paper. My drawings, successful or not, are a reminder of a special moment in time, TO ME, and that is what is important.
I also have to be less sensitive to what other people say – which I’ll admit is easier to do on some days than others! We all have different tastes in what we like or don’t like, and that’s what fills our world and our lives with interest and excitement. Imagine how dull things would be if we agreed all the time and there was nothing to challenge us or make us think! The reality, when I slow down to think more logically, is that for every single artwork I do, whether or not I see it as successful or plan to gesso straight over it (yes, I do that sometimes), there is ALWAYS someone who says “I love that!” while another grunts and changes the subject. The whole point of creativity is that we see it as individuals, through different eyes and different experiences, that is different for each of us, and that may change over time depending on our mood or the way the light coming through the window hits the canvas. That is what makes it special 🙂
Long live creativity – and these dotty flowers!
What about you? Have you ever felt your confidence slip because of something you later realised was silly?